SATIRE: “Little Einstein”

Student gets A- on quiz, proud RA hangs it right on the fridge

 The Hollywood Walk of Fame. Academy Awards. The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. There are few honors so great as recognition of a job well done from others.

Ferris business administration junior Steven Stekis knows the feeling well, after recently presenting his business law quiz—on which he received a 91 percent—to his resident adviser in Puterbaugh Hall.

“Wow, this is really good! You know where this is going? That’s right! Right up on the fridge so that I can look at it everyday, my little Einstein,” said Puterbaugh Hall Resident Adviser Sasha Porpoise.

Porpoise had to push aside other graded works and completed pages of coloring books that other residents had created in order to make room for Stekis’ quiz on her mini-fridge.

“I wanted Steven to have the best coddling money can buy. Which is why I insisted that he live in the residence halls for his junior year,” Stekis’ mother said. “If he was living off campus, who would keep an eye on him and make sure he’s tucked in at night?”

At press time, Stekis was seen changing into his footy pajamas while Porpoise carried her weathered copy of “Goodnight Moon” and a glass of warm milk to his room.