I remember my social life in middle school through high school vividly, especially eighth grade and beyond.
Not to be cocky, but I was literally everyone’s friend. I was at the top of my game. I had a ton of guy friends who would flirt with me (which amazes me due to my extreme middle school awkwardness) and a ton of girls that always seemed to enjoy my company. There were few people with whom I didn’t get along.
As high school approached and my freshman year began, I was still searching to be the girl that everyone liked, that everyone could call friend. Despite my freshman stature, I was outgoing and I had a lot of older connections.
My sophomore year I entered into my first real relationship, and that’s when things slowly started to change. I was still outgoing and could pretty much talk to and get along with anyone, but I began to draw into myself more. I chose to disclose the things in me with those closest to me, and to truly value the power of real, intimate friendships and relationships. My senior year was the climax of this transition, as I found that true friends were few and hard to find.
So when I came to Ferris, I didn’t know what to expect. I figured I’d be meeting everyone and anyone, and that living in such close quarters with people would have me being a social butterfly again. In a way, that did happen, and I absolutely love my hall and the people in it.
Regardless, I still tend to hold on to those close relationships. When I come home on weekends, I’m not bombarded by a huge group of people like I would have been in late middle school, but I immediately meet up with my few close friends every time, or spend the weekend with my family and boyfriend. At school, when I truly need somebody, I can’t run to everyone I see in the hall. There are only a few that really know my heart.
My point is this: I think college is a time a lot of people decide to be “the life of the party,” whether that statement is literal at a night out or just playing a game with 20 people in the hall lobby. As much as I truly love socializing and getting to know the wonderful people here, and I am always up for a fun hall game night or any other group activity, I just seem to find so much fulfillment in investing time in the people that truly matter—the people who will stay true to you and have shown a vested interest in your life.
That’s not to say you shouldn’t reach out to others and build new relationships at all. It’s just the way I see it, I’d rather invest love and time and true friendship into three people and permanently change their lives for the better than change the day of 100 people. I want lasting friendships and relationships, because the truth is—for most of us—as we get older, the group of intimate people in our lives will grow smaller and smaller. We’ll probably grow less bold in that social sense, and learn to value the beauty of authenticity in relationships. We’ll value our children, our spouses, our families, and that small group of friends that we knew would always be there. n