If you read the news you’ve probably heard about all the ruckus on college campuses with “safe spaces.” From what I understand, these are where people can go where they don’t have to hear any scary ideas. Now, I applaud Ferris for including this idea on campus, but sometimes I need a place for where I can recuperate from the stresses of daily life.
I have never been to the wonders of the world. I’ve never seen the Colosseum, the Washington Monument, the Grand Canyon or the GOP headquarters. Why have I deprived myself of these beautiful places? Because I have already seen the most beautiful place on earth.
I’ve been where you can go to see people get arrested, fights between alpha-males and a line to the women’s room longer than the English Channel and I’ve watched it all with a cold-activated Coors Light in my hand.
If you haven’t already guessed, the place is Shooters. I haven’t had many good things to say about Shoots in my past articles. Reading this now, you might think I am a flip-flopper like Marco Rubio, but Shooters really has always had a special place in my heart.
Sure, the wood paneling is reminiscent of a funeral home built in 1971, and sure, the bar does not have bathrooms that likely pass the health inspection but that is what gives Shoots its charm. We are in college after all.
The most anti-Shooters people go there with arms folded, begging their friends to make a left into the Crankers parking lot, but the next morning, though they won’t admit it, they had a ton of fun and they can’t wait to go again next weekend.
The fact is, Shooters is the most visited of the bars near campus, so they must be doing something right. They don’t have expensive liquor, they don’t have an extensive food menu and you won’t find Kanye West sitting in the V.I.P. Room. But what you will find is a home.
Go to FAC at 3 p.m., hit the dance floor at midnight and be there in the morning to pick up your driver’s license that you forgot to grab on the way out. There will be a time when you are drinking at a fancy country club and you will look back and think, “I wish I was at Shooters.”