Modern Love

One of the guys

Life is a lot less complicated and a whole lot less dramatic when you’re the girl that’s “one of the guys.”

Guy friends are the best. They’re funny, protective, and who better to complain about men to than other men who can provide some insight.

However, when it comes to dating, having a bunch of guy friends might not be the most graceful situation to handle.

The first problem comes when one of your bros gets a girlfriend. They swear up and down that you’re still friends, but once he gets a girlfriend, sorry homegirl, but you are out of the picture for that seven months of his life.

It’s so awkward because you have to understand like yeah, his girlfriend obviously just sees you as another female he’s spending time with therefore that will never fly with her, but come on.

As a girl that’s always one of the guys, losing one of your best friends for extended periods of time is really inconvenient and a little heartbreaking.

It’s an endless cycle during these times of our lives. Bro gets a girlfriend, you cease communication for the duration of that relationship with occasional arguments about why you two can’t be friends, they break up, and it’s back to normal. Rinse and repeat.

Let’s not forget the times one of your bros gets a real feisty girlfriend that sees you on his Facebook. So of course, being the territorial creatures we are, she has to send you a catty message which she mistakenly believes will make you “back off.” This usually prompts a girl fight between you and said temporary girlfriend.

Nothing can describe the feeling of betrayal when your bro takes her side, but get used to it girlfriend because he will always take her side. Can you really blame him though? He’s not getting any from you! You’ll get an apology after they break up, don’t worry.

Let’s flip the script because you aren’t the only one dealing with it. What happens when YOU get a boyfriend?

Yup. No matter how you try to explain it to your man, no matter how long you’ve been strictly platonic with your bros, he will never feel comfortable with you hanging out with them.

If you even so much as get a text from one of your bros, it never fails. You will look up, hoping your boyfriend doesn’t see it, but he did. Cue the eye roll and crabby attitude for the rest of the night.

So what do you do? Risk the relationship or the friendship?

Hey boyfriends, your girl could just as easily be messing around with her female friends as she could her male friends.

Hey girlfriends, if you can’t trust your man to control himself around the presence of any female, then you probably shouldn’t be dating him.

The best way to handle these kinds of situations is to have them all get to know each other. Listen to everyone’s needs in the situation and try to figure out how to give a little and get a little. The discomfort that the girlfriends, the friends, the boyfriends all feel is because of the unknown.