It’s #DartySzn, folks

If the weather gets sunny and above 40 degrees, day drinking begins

When frat boys are seen on their porches before 4 p.m. with a Natural Light in hand, it can only mean one thing: darty szn is upon us. 

Darty szn can be defined in layman’s terms as “day-party season” and it is essentially any span of time when the weather reaches the appropriate temperature to merit drinking outside as soon as one rolls out of bed. This season appears at will in Michigan, especially in the spring, so students should keep a close eye on the forecast. 

“Once I walk outside my door and I don’t need multiple coats, that’s how I know it’s time to start shotgunning Nattys on my porch,” Ferris undecided sophomore and Sigma Apple Pi brother Ricky Bobbie said. 

With the weather getting warmer, students are reminiscing of the fall darty and tailgate season not too long ago as they look forward to this darty szn. 

“Darty szn changed my life,” Ferris pre-medicine junior Anita Knapp said. “I had no idea my body was capable of getting schwasted at 3 in the afternoon and again at 8 that night. The human body is truly amazing.” 

According to 99.9 percent of the ladies, the best parts of darty szn is the doggos that tag along. The easiest way to get drunk girls excited is to bring a four-legged ball of fur around. Fellas, take notes. 

“Oh my gosh, when I see dogs at darties I just lose it,” Ferris professional golf management freshman Joy Gilmore said. “They’re just, like, so adorable, I can’t even handle it.” 

A rising trend among darty-goers is fanny-packs. This versatile pouch from the 90s has become wildly popular among girls and can hold the essentials along with anything from extra vape juice to fruit snacks. 

For students looking to join the darty szn craze, the next big opportunity is Ferris Fest on April 7.

Click here for all-you-can-eat fruit snacks.